To be a good listener you simply have to listen, and take notes - whether mental or actual - but to be an excellent listener, you need to SHOW that you're listening, or that you have listened.
You can be a good - or excellent - listener:
1. while somebody is speaking to you
2. after somebody has spoken to you
3. while reading something
4. after reading something
1. WHILE SOMEBODY IS SPEAKING TO YOU
- Give them your undivided attention; try and avoid distractions - if the meeting was planned, arrange for no distractions in advance
- Without actually interrupting their flow, give a very short little burst of laughter (if appropriate) or make little sounds or utter words or short phrases:
Really?
Gosh!
I see.
Wow.
I'm sorry.
Uh-huh.
No way!
Please repeat that.
- Facial expressions and head movements:
- Nod, shake your head, frown, smile,
- Use just your face to express amazement, shock, pity, concern
Be on the look out for pauses while the person speaks to you. If it's clear they're not yet done speaking, encourage them to continue by asking a question - even just "And?" or simply say "Continue."
2. AFTER SOMEBODY HAS SPOKEN TO YOU
Try not to assume that they are really done speaking. Ask questions and encourage them to continue speaking. If they've asked questions, answer the questions and then ask if they have any more questions, or, after you've spoken a bit, ask them "What are your thoughts?"
Focus on them: don't tell your own story unless they asked you to - rather speak about what they've just said - express how you feel about what they've just said, offer your opinion or advice
3. WHILE READING SOMETHING
- Avoid distractions
- Re-read if you lose focus or don't understand something the first time round
- Take notes
4. AFTER READING SOMETHING
- Write something that others will see, that shows them what you have learned
- Write a question, that the writer of what you just read might see, to show that you're interested and would like to know more
- Take action - if what you read were instructions or tips, do the actions that show that you are following those instructions or using those tips
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To be a good listener you simply have to listen, and take notes - whether mental or actual - but to be an excellent listener, you need to SHOW that you're listening, or that you have listened.
You can be a good - or excellent - listener:
1. while somebody is speaking to you
2. after somebody has spoken to you
3. while reading something
4. after reading something
1. WHILE SOMEBODY IS SPEAKING TO YOU
- Give them your undivided attention; try
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more
