What do you mean by 'not good' at approaching people face to face?
There can be many reasons why we feel we aren't good at approaching people! Maybe fear, lack of confidence, previous rejections? Maybe you are ok once you get talking to someone but that initial approach and how to start the conversation is what you don't like!
Some people have no problem approaching someone and starting the conversation, but the actual conversation isn't 'successful'!
I think for most of us who struggle with this area it's usually the first category in some way!
Many years ago I attended a Presentation Skills Workshop, and at the end of the week we all had to give 20 minute presentation to the whole class which was filmed! We were all terrified of the filming, but when it came to my turn I wasn't as terrified of that as I was of standing in front of my colleagues and talking for 20 minutes! I was literally shaking inside! But when I watched the film of my presentation with the course leader I was amazed! I di not look nervous at all! I was calm, professional and looked like I knew what I was talking about! I have thought of that experience many times over the years, when I've felt afraid or unprepared, and it helps me to remember that however you feel on the inside, no one else can see your feelings!
In my 'other job' I teach English, and again that was a real challenge at first, to overcome my fears and inadequacies. Apart from remembering my film experience I also find it helps to remember that all presentation/teaching/informing people should have an element of acting in it! I don't mean that you invent a story that's fictional! But make it fun and interesting! Make them laugh - at appropriate times and not too much! Tell them your stories and experiences. Involve them by asking searching questions that will make them think how they can use it for themselves.
Also, remember that whoever you are talking to, you have the element of surprise! What I mean is that they don't know what you are going to say next! If you've planned the outline of what you want to say then you know where you are going, they don't!
Find a way to make them feel at ease, that will relax you too!
Never rush through what you want to say! Give your listener time to process what you are saying, not just the words, but the meaning, the implications and possibilities for themselves. Remember that you know what you are talking about, they don't, yet! Give them time to absorb it and ask you questions!
Don't overwhelm them with information! Give them enough to get them interested and to think about, but leave them hungry for more, then have the courage to 'walk away'! In other words say something like 'I don't want to overwhelm you with information, why don't you think about what we've discussed here about ........ And we can meet up again in a few days/next week to discuss it further'.
Fnd a practice partner! Someone that you can trust to not laugh at you but give you honest feedback, or just a person you can practise with! If you need to, write out an example conversation word for word, learn it and then practise it with someone!
After every conversation or presentation do an analysis... How did it go? What was good? What wasnt so good? How did I feel? How did the other person react? What was their body language telling me? What can I learn from this? What can I change about my presentation that will improve it?
Don't be afraid to fail! actually you only really fail if you give up and refuse to try again! Keep trying. Most, if not all famous people, politicians, scientists, inventors, artists... Failed! Some at school, some in their work, some socially, but the great ones refused to give up. They never stopped believing that they could do it, find it, invent it...
Never, never, never, never, never give up!! As Winston Churchill said... I may have got the number of 'never's wrong!
Finally, the more difficult something is to do, the sweeter the taste of success when you break through your fears and achieve it!
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11/17/2014 11:11 pm